Should i be here

[AllOut]

How anon is this forum? Im feeling depressed im not on meth anymore and feel depressed feels like my life is over if i cant get high bleurgh is this normal fml

[derek d j]

It means you may now classify yourself as 'normal'. The miserable state of 'normal' minds is about as normal as snow in July, imo, but that's a whole different matter.

Anonymous? Somebody's always looking at ya, haven't you noticed? New members are tracked down and followed from morning till night. Just like your dsp. You have to work out for yourself which ostensible maintenance fans are really periwinkle agent-provacateurs. A paranoid is never bored.

[froude]

Never a truer word spoken there Derek"A paranoid is never bored".I bet my key has been on here,and many more do,my first one regulary had a ponder and she liked it.All the best Froude.

Cant say im always bored or just plain old bored,always something to do,then again ive a 3yr old

[Anon33]

Yes you should be here....u aint dead....so live....it is only natural to feel low after detox.....Detox 5 recommend you take anti depressants for at least 1 year....but that is some over priced detox sedation centre-what would they know.....buy a bike with all the dosh you are gonna save and cheer up, vroom vroom

[usandthem]

You may have detoxed too soon. It takes a good 3 to 5 years to do a good safe detox, depending on the length you have been addicted and how long you have been maintained on a stable dose. Its not always going to be the great life some keys like you to think you are going to have when completely abstinent. Quite the opposite and it can lead you down limbo land of instability and highly fluxuated depressions. Firstly you need to be settled and that can be hard for any addict. Im afraid being abstinents doesn't get easy for a long while and some may need 24/7 support. I myself found I needed to fill that big addictive gap with drinking strong beer (you got it, another addiction replaces another addiction - in my experience anyway). Then I hit the gear again and the beer. So recovery and detox from methaadone never worked for me it just made me worse. Your NTA should have a catch-you net policy which covers all services centers for failed detox if you feel you have come away from maintenance too soon. Ring your local PCT or find a way to get through your problem. Or you could ask for seroxat from your GP or something that can help string you along after detox. Paranoia and emotional overload can all spring up in opiate withdrawal too. Not nice. Good luck Allout in your choices. John

[froude]

Personally ive always said,if you do your De-tox off your own belt like you have ,you need after care(KW)even if this is just sat there not saying much ,im sure if you know there is someone there,it helps,All the best Froude

[usandthem]

Yes they always have an after care part of dat detox service. I think their are some safety nets for failed detox and unsuccessful discharges. Other than that I don't think a good GP would see you in a wired state. Im sure there are plenty of channels to get you put back right. Failing that then have yourself sectioned under the mental health act and you will find they will have you back on your original methadone dose through a 5ml step up. Simon the alliance's resident nurse might be able to help you more in this area and he may post a few helpful links for you Allout. Never give up hope is the 1st rule. John

[AllOut]

Yeah Im alright just having a whinge just feels like sobriety takes the shine off life!
peace out!

[AllOut]

Tell you something funny/paranoid was in the CDAT this morning and in the waiting room this man walks in and I get chatting,hes really nice freindly guy very interesting as well and I start thinking "that could be Froude and i wouldnt know, sounds a bit like froude" ha ha bit weird can just imagine me Surreptitiously winking and saying "Froude is that you?"  To which the man would say  and I would say in a loud whisper "its alright Im sound" still winking.

[usandthem]

What??? You mean I gave all that advice for nowt??!! 

[froude]

Sorry, it wasnt me otherwise,otherwise i would of winked back  and said "is that you AllOut" ,All the best Froude

[sapphire]

Tell you something funny/paranoid was in the CDAT this morning and in the waiting room this man walks in and I get chatting,hes really nice freindly guy very interesting as well and I start thinking "that could be Froude and i wouldnt know, sounds a bit like froude" ha ha bit weird can just imagine me Surreptitiously winking and saying "Froude is that you?"  To which the man would say  and I would say in a loud whisper "its alright Im sound" still winking.

Ha ha, you'll get thrown out if you keep giving strange men the nod!!

[OP8S]

Depends on your reasons for being abstinent. Your's will be different from mine, we're all different. If life is too hard without the meds then take the meds, it's better than slipping into alcoholism as has been explained very honestly to you by usandthem. If you'd rather keep stay away from other substances an anti-depressant may help. I've always felt very emotional if I'd done a home detox, but have failed many times & am happier staying on my meds, otherwise I just look for some other substance. I've been the most stable while on a theraputic dose of methadone, I rarely use opiates , smoke a bit of weed but can take it or leave it.
If your mood was better while taking methadone maybe maintenance could be an option for you. Either that or or your going to have to tough it out if abstinence is what you want. I'm sure it must take the mind a good while to return to what "normal" is if you have had addictions of any kind.

[AllOut]

Im so fucked off! Im off the meth but nowts changed! Yes I was stable for a bit then started craving Yes my insomnia went away and it was pretty good for a while then I started missing getting high so came off rapidly so I could get high but its not the same it sucks BUT I dont like being on something that I have to take I feel so stuck I feel like im fucked if i do im fucked if i dont Methadone is a bitch to come off of and I fuckin hate that! fml dont know what to do. I dont mind being on something for as long as it takes but not when if i miss a dose its hell,

[froude]

Abstinent,I dont want to be doing drugs all the time ,but a nice pipe and couple of bags at christmas is nice ,or when you want,CHOICE thats what i want ,NOT the daily grind of the Heroin addict,thinking on Tuesday of Wednesday's hit, or going out and having to rob someone(yeah i feel gulty now,and yeah ive paid for it).Going to get it down to Bristol  used to be part of the buzz aswell,the whole fucking thing,its a nightmare that we have all been in im sure.Ive told my D.S.P im not being abstinent,but ive also said i will not stop taking drugs whether it is Ketamin,Lsd,Mushrooms, Heroin or Crack,I will still use,what do  they think im going to Glastonbury and eating guamo all night ,are they mad.I know it isnt for everyone and the only thing they can do is stop drugs completely and im all for that,im also for having a laugh and having a trip or a few mushrooms,dont think I will get myself addicted to Heroin again,the only thing that will do that, is if i go and get a habit,and i just dont think it will ever happen again ,too many things have happened in my life, for me to realise that we are only here for a short time ,so make the most of it,All the best Froude