Finally getting reduced

[OP8S]

Hey, don't feel stupid man. I'm sure that not one of us who posted thought that you were making the wrong desicion, I even paused before I did post. If somebody wants to be abstinent good on them , it's their live, their desicion. Sounds like you have thought about it though, a care plan after only two appointments  . I'd imagine in this case your reduction will very probably be the next time you pick up, or certainly your next script. Each & every one of us meets our keys, & is civil, polite, fuck even pleasant because we feel that we need to prove to them that just because we've been addicts doesn't mean that we're bad people. I do it myself, but after this last carry on where I was deliberatley excluded from something just because of my own beliefs, I will be attending my appointment with gloves off ( not literally of course, a key isn't worth a charge of assault...hmmm, nah! ). I will be civil, but I can't promise that I'll be polite & as far as pleasant goes, they can fuck right off. I will be telling him exactly what I think of their nice little money earner of a CDT & that I do not want anything more to do with them. I take no part in any of the activities, all I do is endure half an hour of " hows it going, hows the kids..., oh & when are you going to come off these drugs we were so eager to provide you with ? " when I tell them that I have no immeadiate plans to do so it's met with ignorance & judgemental comments, so I leave feeling worse than when I went in. That's care ? My GP is quite happy with prescribing me the dose I'm on until I'm ready to reduce if I want & my old CPN has told me that he's happy to see me should I require anybody to talk to should I go through a bad patch, winter's just around the corner & is often the hardest time of the year for me. So really my CDT has nothing to offer me at all as far as services go, I'm not wasting my time justifying myself to them. If they want to be of any use then they should find somebody who really needs the help that they are offering..." the road to recovery".
Good luck with the 5mls, I hope that all goes well, but make sure that you're in control. The next time your key mentions a reduction, tell him that you will think about it in your own time, away from the pressure of your parole officer key-workers prescence. Things often look different when you are not put on the spot as it were.

[froude]

Training Derek,they dont have training,if they do its probably one of them courses where you got four groups of people a rope ,two empty barrels and you gotta get across a river,and they use the bridge,sums it up.I cant believe ive been so stupid,silly old me thinking im in control when im not at all.Well now i cant wait for my next appointment,ive been used like everyone else,fucking wankers .Well i can tell you this ,i will be staying at 50mil,cheers to you all froude.

[sapphire]

Well, as much as I love a good keyworker moan as much as the next person I was pleasntly surprised yesterday.

My new key, after asking about my drug using history, instead of saying "reduce 2ml a fortnight you won't feel it" said, "well, given how long you have been opiate dependant it is up to you if you want to try to reduce but it may be the case that you will need substitute prescribing for a very long time".

What is so good is that she is actually giving me choice!! No one ever has before!!

She has said I can stay where I am, try to reduce, increase some more, whatever I like!! I nearly dropped dead of a heart attack.

I am so surprised also by her subject knowledge, she has no drug use persoanlly but knows shed loads more than most of the keyworkers I have had in the past.

I was going to jettison her due to her "hand-wringing, OMG you've been on high doses for so long" on our first appt. and I'm glad I didn't. Also told her how stressed it made me to have to worry about whether my script was going to be at the chemist or not and she has changed the dates of my script (apparantly it kept getting forgotten as it was the only one on a diff. day to the rest of the SU's that use my chemist).

So, pleasently surprised so far. Knowing my luck though she'll do a complete 180 by the time I see her next!

[derek d j]

Maybe they read your posts, Sapph. " Go easy on this one, keys, she's belligerent." Good to hear the pressure is off. Hopefully the 'bad for your heart' nonsense will stop as well.

[Anon33]

Froude....I certainly wasn't implying that you are going to relapse, just saying a recent experience of mine, in my area.....I am all for anyone reducing ....I have many times, but I have also had the same amount of euphoria leaving a keywork session feeling 'empowered' then realising I didn't have time to think, it all went a bit quick....besides you haven't used for ages so its probably the right time for you, all I was saying is that as long as its YOUR decision, not theirs

[sapphire]

Maybe they read your posts, Sapph. " Go easy on this one, keys, she's belligerent." Good to hear the pressure is off. Hopefully the 'bad for your heart' nonsense will stop as well.

I did speak to her as well about the other people (I obv. did not tell her who) who are getting pressure to reduce when they don't want to.
Apparently the lead doctor had been advising all the keys to tell SU's to start 2ml a fortnight reductions. She has said she will speak to him about this as it's obviously not good practise to expect everyone to suddenly be ready or want to reduce/detox, I am glad that she see's the futility of it but worry for others with diif. keys.

[usandthem]

It is sad..that the command gets sent down from whitehall to the already stressing and worrying methadone maintenance service user. shared care is more control given to them (the keys) by the doctor - and less choice for us..the SU..this is all about getting numbers down to them...forget the harm it might cause..imminent relapses and suicides because of not being able to negotiate your own dosage and stay static...if I could buy my methadone and get rid of all this peer controlled beauraucracy. This is getting more like a probation service than a place of care where the client controls their own future...key workers have no clue about drug withdrawal except "2ml a month you won't even feel it honest"..and "how are things looking on the job front"...AAAAAhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHH!!!! im a manic depressive mental health case !!! not someone who wants to withdraw because you want me to..and not someone who wants to get a job because you want me to..Its ok if you are wanting these things and you have a clear head...key workers are so blind to the needs of addicts...the need of addicts to leave them alone and check they are ok and then test them or make up their script as they are paid to do..instead of pressurising the patient so that the only one who benefits is the key worker and the doctor..through Government and Primary Care lead targets...Its a pharce..No voice!!! Thank god that other people are like me Thank you Alliance

[froude]

Went down yesterday(tuesday)to pick up my script,and i had about four scripts to sign,i asked Dorothy(pharmacist)how long those scripts were for and if they had dropped me or what is happening.She said"Your perscriptions are made out until the end of October and none of them have changed,they are still at 55mil" ,told her i was expecting them to change my script and she said it looks like they wont be dropping them until the ones she has got have gone,unless my local D.S.P dont send out more scripts it looks like they wont be dropping me until after the end of October.Seems weird to me ,they bleat on about reducing ,say they are going to reduce me 5mil to 50mil yet send out scripts for 55mil until the end of October.Im going to ring them today and say "Had a long think about it and dont want to be reduced yet,its not as if im fucking them about, they aint even done the scripts for my reducement yet.Have a good day to you all ,all the best Froude